I think Charlie is enjoying me being around more with my commission as he gets to go for more walks, though he seems a lot older since I visited a week ago – though maybe it’s because I only got to take him for one walk and he’s had three this time.
Sometimes I feel awkward about walking him. He had really long fur for a while because there was no space at the groomers so I felt a bit embarrassed walking him as it was so bad.
I notice a guy walking his dog who we saw yesterday. Charlie is a bit weird about other dogs so as soon as I saw him yesterday I put him back on his leash. I never used to like taking him off his leash as my grandparents didn’t like it as he once nearly drowned, but he just walks around sniffing everything and I get bored of walking slowly with him so if no one is nearby I let him off. The guy had seen that I put him on his leash and after a while he did too. I worried that he thought that I thought his dog was mean or that I was protecting him from Charlie and so he thought Charlie was mean. Nothing happened though yesterday.
Today, the guy doesn’t put his dog on the leash but Charlie spots the dog and I run to get him so that I can put him on his leash and hurt my ankle a little. The dog passes and Charlie starts barking so loud and jumps around. I feel so embarrassed. I say ‘chill out man’ and stand there just staring at Charlie to avoid looking at the guy. I’m worried that the guy is judging me, that I am a bad owner for Charlie’s behaviour.
We don’t get far today as Charlie is sniffing everything. We start to walk back towards the house. He sees an older couple walking in the distance and he stops and stares at them. I’m like ‘come on Charlie, let’s go home’ and he doesn’t move. The couple get closer and make a comment about him waiting for them. I say ‘My grandad passed away and so was looking to see if you were my Grandad’ which is true, but then I worry that I offended the man as I am basically saying that he is old. They are old enough to be my Grandparents though. I say ‘he stares at everyone though’ to try to make the situation a little less awkward. The guy says he would stroke Charlie and that he likes dogs but he is allergic to them, so then I worry that Charlie is going to make him sneeze or something. After a minute I think they want to go so I say ‘have a nice day’ and I feel awkward as maybe they weren’t in such a rush.
When I mentioned my Grandad I felt very emotional as last night my sister and I were looking at old photos and it made me miss him a lot. He’s been gone for 3 years.