I cried briefly today, then I stopped myself from crying more. I cried because I said I had wanted to go to something. Then yesterday I decided I would rather not go, but I didn’t want people to think bad of me. I stressed about how not straight forward it was going to be to get there and decided to catch an earlier train to give myself time to eat something and go to the bathroom. I get there to find that the event had been cancelled 2 days ago and it's a long bus journey to where I need to be next. I could have stayed at home for 3 1/2 more hours. I feel stupid for feeling this way.
I fought with myself about whether or not I wanted this to be my story for today. I later wrote a different one about experience in a café, but I think part of this project is not hiding away from some stories. I was worried that the story might upset other people, but I guess this whole story is about worrying what other people think too much rather than being truthful to myself.
(Reviewing this before posting it, I had forgotten about this by the next day. I think the need to comment on this means again that I am worrying too much about upsetting other people, even though it's fine and I have treated it as a learning curve. I think the need to write that says a lot...)